Stories in Washington

Dad Jokes So Corny You’ll Want to Make Like a Tree and Leaf

 Closeup of the head of a sandhill crane with its bill open.
You Crack Me Up Everyone can get a chuckle out of these dad jokes. © Mike Benbow

Stumped on what to give Dad fir Father’s Day? Yew will be re-leafed to know that we’ve rounded up our favorite nature-themed dad jokes. These jokes might be sappy, but we ash-ure you they wood make your dad chuckle.

Closeup of a dragonfly on a blade of grass with the words Nature is so resourceful, it can make dew with just water on top of the image.
Dad Jokes © The Nature Conservancy/Chris Helzer

Nature is so resourceful. It can make dew with just water.

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

Why was the whale sad? It lost its porpoise.

Why do crabs never give to charity? Because they’re shellfish.

For a fungi to grow, you must give it as mushroom as possible.

The sea cucumber turns to the octopus and sea urchin and says: “With friends like these, who needs anemones?”

I was going to grow some herbs, but I couldn’t find the thyme.

Forested mountains shrouded in fog with the words I tried to catch some fog, but I mist on top of the image.
Dad Jokes © Kent Mason

I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.

Why doesn't the sun need to go to college? Beause it already has millions of degrees.

What happened when Ally Algae and Freddy Fungus started dating? They took a lichen to each other.

Hey flower lovers: What did the male stamen say to the female pistil? I like your style.

Why can you never trust atoms? They make up everything.

Ocean waves lap at a beach at sunset with the words What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, it just waved written on top of the image.
Dad Jokes © Kinzie + Riehm

I saw a beaver movie last night. It was the best dam movie I have ever seen.

A forester is walking through the forest and a tree yells, “Stop! You can't cut me down, I’m a talking tree!” The forester responds: “Yeah, and you’ll dialogue.”

What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, it just waved.

How do you catch a rare pygmy rabbit? Unique up on it.

A dung beetle walks into a bar and asks: “Is this stool taken?”

Closeup of fish on a flat surface with the words What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh written on the image.
Dad Jokes © Tim Calver

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.

Why didn’t the seagull fly over the bay? Because then it’d be a baygull!

Why couldn’t the shellfish farmer go for a run? He pulled a mussel.

Smaller babies may be delivered by stork, but the heavier ones need a crane.

I couldn’t marry the gardener. He was too rough around the hedges.